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Monthly Archives: August 2009
Lust is not Love
Some of life’s greatest lessons are counter intuitive. Growing up I always believed the ultimate in an interpersonal relationship was love. Now those exact words didn’t exist, but the thought process was the same.
Some men select a bride because she has pretty eyes, some because she has pretty hair. A man once married his bride because she could sing. On the morning after their marriage, when he saw her without any paint or powder on, and saw a part of her hair on the dresser, he looked at her and said,” Sing, for hell sakes, sing!”
Our Greatest Challenge
It is has been said that you will marry or raise your greatest challenge!
Yesterday I invited my granddaughter’s parents over to our house. Abigail, my granddaughter, is the cutest little piece of energy in existence. Just look at her!
Her dad sent me this response.
I told Heather about the discussion, and this was her reply
Let’s refer to “Abigail” as… The Monster.
The Monster only slept for an hour today.
The Monster is very grumpy.
You married Perfection
Have you ever wondered what would happen if a perfect man married a perfect woman?
I’ll wager that he would shoot her inside of a week if she didn’t strangle him first.
The story is told of a husband, who after three months of marriage, sat down to dinner with his wife and said: “I think it’s time we discussed some needed areas of improvement in our marriage. I’ll like to share a list of things you can improve on and then you can share your ideas with me.”
Puppy Dogs and Men
During a conversation with my wife the other day, Cheri commented that men are just like puppy dogs. Since I’m not fully comfortable being compared to the four-legged animal kingdom, I asked for clarification. She smiled and explained: “Dogs are pleasers. They want their masters to be happy.”
She’s right. I am a pleaser. I don’t like it when my wife is angry with me. I want to make her happy and I don’t like the doghouse. I prefer my wife’s bed, just like my dog.
Flying Under the Radar
In the year 2009, it is currently vogue to be wired 24/7. It’s harmful, but it is cool. Without the ability to fly under the radar screen for a period of time to recharge your batteries, you are living on the edge of stress and your body and mind are red lining.
I think being cool is just the opposite. Take an evening this week and fly under the radar screen. Drive your friends and relatives bonkers and turn off all electronic contact power from 5PM to morning. Achieve some balance by finding some ‘me’ time without electronics. Meditate, singularly focus your mind on something or on nothing and regenerate your batteries.
Noisy Isolation
We live in a world of noisy isolation. Our contact with electronic gadgets exceeds our contact with humans. We’re busier, faster, brighter, and full of more information than at any time in the history of mankind. But do we talk to each other?
The microchip explosion has changed our ability to become intimate with our loved ones. We text them quick statements that are Egyptian characters in nature: mostly consonants or acronyms. LOL (laugh out loud), BTW (by the way), TTYL (talk to you later), and OMGTKOFGG (oh my gosh the kitchen’s on fire, gotta go).
Where Have all the Children Gone?
If you were asked what means more to you than anything in the world? What would you say? What would almost anybody say?
I just returned from spending almost a week with the Boy Scouts on a High Adventure in the San Juan Islands. Camping, hiking, cliff jumping, kayaking, swimming and adventure in record-breaking heat.
It was a marvelous time and what made the experience so great was that my son, Scott, spent the time with me as my tent buddy. Each night around the campfire (non-blazing because of a burn ban) we spent time with 15 scouts discussing morals, family, honesty, integrity, and many of the essentials skills and attributes that make up a successful person.
Don't Say "I Do" until you Read These
1. “How To Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie
This is a timeless piece of literature. Mr. Carnegie weaves stories, anecdotes, and wisdom from the ages on how to get along with people, business associates, clients, and family. This book introduces you to the importance of asking questions before rendering judgment.
2. “The Anatomy of Peace” by The Arbinger Institute
Jim Ferrell and his staff have written an incredible book on developing relationships. Arbinger has developed a language of their own and it’s sweeping the nation. Learn what it means to get ‘Out of the box’ and how to stay there. Every husband, wife, mother, father, and in-law needs to have the tools found in this book.
So You're Getting Married
I have some good news and some bad news.
First the good news: if approached correctly, married life will be the most glorious, blessed, and rewarding time spent with another person. Words are inept at trying to explain the love, the trust, and the respect that are developed in a successful marriage. Happy marriages deepen and get better with time.
Now the bad news: if not approached correctly, you have a 50 percent chance of getting a divorce. That doesn’t count marriages that don’t end in divorce but are not happy.
So now what? Consider this question:
Posted in Communication
Tagged Cause of Divorce, Effective Communication, Getting Married, Newlyweds
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